Started in Friendship

Written By: Marlene Osteen | Issue: November 2023

Susan and Robert E. Smith

The first time Susan Smith saw Robert E. he was vaulting toward the water, buffeted in the air by a rope swing, before plunging into a creek in Pelham, Alabama. 

Amidst the joyful chaos of bodies hurtling into the water that summer day in 1964, she couldn’t help but notice the broad smiles and gleeful laughs of the fraternity boys and thought to herself, “Look at those guys, they’re having so much fun.” 

Little did she know then that Robert E. was about to become a significant part of her life. 

June 1, 1968

It was the summer before Susan’s sophomore year at Birmingham Southern College, where Robert E. was about to begin his freshman year.  They were all gathered at the ATO pledge party, hosted at Susan’s grandparents’ farm – chosen because Susan was dating one of the fraternity members. Now, 55 years later they both fondly recall that day as the occasion of their first meeting – though they didn’t exchange a word back then.  

It would be several months before destiny intervened again – when Robert E spotted Susan dashing out of her dorm in hot pursuit of a small critter she kept in her room.  “She caught my attention,” he reminisced, “she was wearing a skirt and a white blouse with a sweater.  I thought she was adorable and I couldn’t help but be intrigued. We stopped and had a chat.”

Their connection deepened during the following summer when they both attended summer school, a smaller program with a more intimate group of students. 

By then, Robert E. had learned from mutual friends that Susan had parted ways with her former boyfriend, just as he had with the girl he had briefly dated.  One day in the snack bar, he spotted Susan engrossed in a game of bridge and struck up a conversation. Ever friendly, Susan invited him to play her hand but it soon became apparent he was a novice at the game. Ultimately Susan taught him how to play, and as he learned they grew closer.  It didn’t take long for Robert E. to call and ask her out.

Their first date was a night at the movies.  It was an evening filled with animated conversation.  “We had an incredible time, and our conversation flowed effortlessly,” Robert E. recalled.  “There was an undeniable spark that I felt, and I’m pretty sure she felt it too.” As they talked, they discovered shared interests and connections. Both had ties to Birmingham Southern College – Susan’s parents were alumni and Robert E.’s father had spent a year there. 

Moreover, the two families had roots in Birmingham and their fathers had served during World War II.  Susan’s father trained pilots during the war, mirroring Robert E’s father’s service during the same conflict.

The relationship that started in friendship blossomed into romance during Susan’s junior year, and they started dating exclusively.  As Susan completed her undergraduate studies and embarked on a path to pursue a Masters in Speech and Hearing Therapy at the University of Alabama, their commitment to each other deepened. But these were tumultuous times marked by the uncertainty of the Vietnam War, and like many young men of that era, Robert E. grappled with an uncertain future. The looming possibility of receiving a draft letter hung over them like a black cloud, as Susan recalled.

Susan, Robert E., Hunter, and Hilary, 1994

During the winter of her first year in graduate school, Susan was mopping the floor of her small Tuscaloosa apartment when Robert E. surprised her by dropping to one knee and proposing.  “Susan leaped into my arms, catching me off guard, and it was one of the happiest days of my life,” Robert E. fondly remembered.  By that time, he had made a clear decision regarding his military service. In fact, he had signed up for an Air Force Officer Training Course and was awaiting assignment for basic training.

They were married on June 1, 1968, in Birmingham in the garden of an old antebellum home.  With 50 close friends and family as witnesses, Susan wearing an A-line white dress with a graceful long lace train, lovingly crafted by her mother.  Remarkably, the same wedding gown would later be worn by both Susan and Robert’s sisters, marking a unique family tradition.

After the wedding, Susan completed her final year of graduate studies and Robert E. worked at the VA hospital while awaiting the air force. By the time she graduated in 1969, Robert E. was doing his basic training in San Antonio. In August 1969 Susan accompanied him on assignment to the base in Chanute, Illinois, for training in aircraft maintenance. 

In 1970 Robert E. was transferred to Okinawa, where they stayed for the next three years.  These were happy and fulfilling years.  Robert E. was assigned to military airlift command and Susan taught the third-grade children of military families. Susan fell in love with the Okinawan people and their culture and they traveled frequently – flying space-available on military planes, visiting Taiwan and Seoul, Hong Kong and the Philippine’s. Their first child, their son Hunter, was born there in 1971. 

Robert E. was released from the military in 1973, though he remained in the Reserves, and the family returned to Tuscaloosa for Robert E.’s graduate studies. Susan gave birth to their daughter Hilary in 1974 in the same Birmingham hospital where she was born.

After receiving his Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology, Robert E worked in administration at the University of Alabama, and Susan taught school – for nine years at the Montessori pre-school and later at the neighborhood elementary school.  

Yet, for years they had dreamed of one day living in Highlands. – a fantasy that became reality in 1994 when The Mountain Retreat and Learning Center welcomed them to their team. Robert E. initially took on the role of Director of Operations, but as needs evolved, he embraced various other positions. Meanwhile, Susan directed the Elder Hostel program. A decade later, Robert E. retired, followed by Susan two years after.  Today they actively engage with local Highlands boards and non-profits, wholeheartedly contributing to their beloved community.

As they celebrate 55 years of marriage, Robert E. is clearly Susan’s biggest fan. He admires her ability to excel in everything she pursues, whether it’s teaching, managing programs at The Mountain or contributing to the town’s welfare.  “She has this incredible talent for making things better, for turning dreams into reality. And I’ve always found her uber attractive,”he says with a chuckle.

Susan, in turn, points to Robert E.’s qualities as father and his respect and kindnesses for everyone around him, “He’s amazingly laid back and handles everything with grace, earning the respect of all who know him. His sense of humor remains intact and people genuinely enjoy his company. “

Together, they take pride in their children and their accomplishments and the strong bonds that tie the family together.